Loss? What does it mean? Loss of property or life?
Loss of property can be replaced given time, but loss of life – never. When someone loses someone near and dear, people often say, give it time… things will get better. I always wonder what their talking about?!! Better with time? For whom ? Maybe for the person saying it because, with time he/she will forget about it and move on with his/her life. What a foolish thing to say and how very naïve of them to assume that everything gets better with time, like time is a panacea for all ills.
I know that with time the pain intensifies, as time flies one realizes the gravity of death. A person who is dead will never ever return. You can never expect them to walk into a room while you’re sitting there, never have a conversation with them, never touch them and never hold them close. And the pain you feel at the unfairness of it all, doesn’t get better with time, it gets worse, like a festering wound, becoming larger and more painful. Losing someone close to you can change your life in ways you never even imagined. It can make you stronger or weaker, the choice is yours. Strong individuals find ways to circumvent the pain and look for ways to channelise it; the weak succumb to the pain and undergo depression, sometimes even trying to commit suicide.
What irritates me is individuals who feel the need to give advice on the loss of a loved one when they have absolutely no idea what their talking about. Sometimes it’s a good idea to shut-up if one doesn’t have anything intelligent to say, might save the rest of us the torture of listening to crap.
Friday, April 20, 2007
Change
Sometimes we foolishly believe that if we take the easier path we'd still be in safe waters.. like a ship in the harbour...but then ships were not made to stay in the harbour...and hanging around in the harbour would just make us into bored, unhappy and dis-satisfied individuals... sometimes it's important to take risks...otherwise life loses its meaning...
Sunday, April 15, 2007
The Quarter Life Crisis
This is the time in your life when you realize that however much you hate it, change is the only constant in life and that things rarely go according to plan. You start realizing that there are many things you thought you would have achieved by this time, but now they seem a distant dream or not even a possibility.
You start feeling insecure and confused about your goals and wonder what you will have achieved in a year or five years time, since you haven’t managed to achieve what you had set out for yourself, and now you’re frightened to set more goals and not achieve them once again.
You start realizing that life is short and that people are important, and somehow you always treated the ones who were difficult better than the ones who always stood by you. You realize that people can be selfish and that the only person who really cares about you and looks out for your interests is yourself and expecting anyone else to do it is just setting yourself up for more disappointment.
You’ve reached a phase in your life where you’ve been through a number of relationships and you now know what you want and don’t want in a relationship, where you are willing to compromise and what you are not willing to budge on.
You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved with every ounce of your being could hurt you so much. You wonder why you go from one destructive relationship to another, constantly searching for that elusive something. Or you lie in bed at night and wonder where all the decent people are hiding because you can’t seem to find anyone that you want to get to know better. Or on the off chance that you do meet someone interesting, they are already taken.
You are now much more confident as a person. You have learnt to take things with a pinch of salt. You laugh and cry with more feeling than you ever did before. Each experience in your life is etched deeply in your mind and impacts the way you think and how you interact with people. You are more careful and less trusting of others. You try hard not to become cold, jaded and cynical.
You begin to judge people more than you did earlier in your life. You are constantly observing other people and renewing the boundaries in your life, adding things to the list of what is acceptable and what is definitely not.
You have a smaller close knit group of friends who form your support system. You talk to your friends about the same things again and again- work, family, higher education, men/women in your life and analyse the same problems again and again searching for solutions, hoping that you will have the courage to make tough decisions and follow through with them.
You stop going along with the crowd and realize that you don’t need to try so hard to fit in. Getting completely wasted and acting like an immature idiot loses its charm. You undergo some self realization and some of the things you’ve discovered about yourself are not entirely pleasant.
You worry more about your family and the health of your loved ones. You take on more responsibility and try to help out with daily chores and financial obligations.
You worry about loans, money, marriage and making a life for yourself. And while achieving all your goals would be nice, you would settle for at least a definite path to your goals with a blue print of all the potholes or at least a way to get around them.
You feel alone, scared, anxious, excited, worried, and happy all at the same time. One minute you wouldn’t want to change anything for the world and the next minute you wonder how you got stuck in this rut.
You know you’ve never felt so alive or so frightened in your entire life. You feel like you are standing at the edge of a cliff and the only way to move forward is to jump and pray the parachute holds.
What you don’t realize is that everyone in this age group is going through something similar and would be able to relate to the gamut of emotions that you are facing. So relax and try to enjoy yourself. Think of it like a roller coaster ride, where you’re poised on top, waiting for it to begin, you know its going to be fun , though scary in some parts and exhilarating in others. So what you need to do is embrace it instead of trying to fight it!
And when you feel lost and lonely next time, remember we are all searching for our place in the world and as we stumble along in search of happiness, there is always company and it’s not going to be a long lonely ride.
I wish you all the very Best of luck ! :-)
You start feeling insecure and confused about your goals and wonder what you will have achieved in a year or five years time, since you haven’t managed to achieve what you had set out for yourself, and now you’re frightened to set more goals and not achieve them once again.
You start realizing that life is short and that people are important, and somehow you always treated the ones who were difficult better than the ones who always stood by you. You realize that people can be selfish and that the only person who really cares about you and looks out for your interests is yourself and expecting anyone else to do it is just setting yourself up for more disappointment.
You’ve reached a phase in your life where you’ve been through a number of relationships and you now know what you want and don’t want in a relationship, where you are willing to compromise and what you are not willing to budge on.
You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved with every ounce of your being could hurt you so much. You wonder why you go from one destructive relationship to another, constantly searching for that elusive something. Or you lie in bed at night and wonder where all the decent people are hiding because you can’t seem to find anyone that you want to get to know better. Or on the off chance that you do meet someone interesting, they are already taken.
You are now much more confident as a person. You have learnt to take things with a pinch of salt. You laugh and cry with more feeling than you ever did before. Each experience in your life is etched deeply in your mind and impacts the way you think and how you interact with people. You are more careful and less trusting of others. You try hard not to become cold, jaded and cynical.
You begin to judge people more than you did earlier in your life. You are constantly observing other people and renewing the boundaries in your life, adding things to the list of what is acceptable and what is definitely not.
You have a smaller close knit group of friends who form your support system. You talk to your friends about the same things again and again- work, family, higher education, men/women in your life and analyse the same problems again and again searching for solutions, hoping that you will have the courage to make tough decisions and follow through with them.
You stop going along with the crowd and realize that you don’t need to try so hard to fit in. Getting completely wasted and acting like an immature idiot loses its charm. You undergo some self realization and some of the things you’ve discovered about yourself are not entirely pleasant.
You worry more about your family and the health of your loved ones. You take on more responsibility and try to help out with daily chores and financial obligations.
You worry about loans, money, marriage and making a life for yourself. And while achieving all your goals would be nice, you would settle for at least a definite path to your goals with a blue print of all the potholes or at least a way to get around them.
You feel alone, scared, anxious, excited, worried, and happy all at the same time. One minute you wouldn’t want to change anything for the world and the next minute you wonder how you got stuck in this rut.
You know you’ve never felt so alive or so frightened in your entire life. You feel like you are standing at the edge of a cliff and the only way to move forward is to jump and pray the parachute holds.
What you don’t realize is that everyone in this age group is going through something similar and would be able to relate to the gamut of emotions that you are facing. So relax and try to enjoy yourself. Think of it like a roller coaster ride, where you’re poised on top, waiting for it to begin, you know its going to be fun , though scary in some parts and exhilarating in others. So what you need to do is embrace it instead of trying to fight it!
And when you feel lost and lonely next time, remember we are all searching for our place in the world and as we stumble along in search of happiness, there is always company and it’s not going to be a long lonely ride.
I wish you all the very Best of luck ! :-)
Different People, Different Views
Strange isn't it how you think you know someone and then something happens, either an event, a disagreement or even a serious conversation about important issues and you suddenly wonder who the other person is... what their real beliefs and values are... what their guiding principles are and how different or similar to yours they are...
The way a person thinks, deals with problems or treats other people depends on how they have been brought up. Family and friends play an important role in nurturing an individual. Many a time our views about certain topics are solely based upon the experiences of our family and friends. And while many of us have similar thoughts about certain issues our views might greatly diverge on other topics...so to assume that just because a person agrees or thinks in a similar fashion about some things that they would agree with you on all other things would be a gross injustice to them and to you...
So when it comes to settling down with someone it's important to figure out those issues which are important to both of you and ensure that your value system is the same atleast on those... otherwise it just leads to un-necessary complications and marriage is tough without having that to deal with too..
The way a person thinks, deals with problems or treats other people depends on how they have been brought up. Family and friends play an important role in nurturing an individual. Many a time our views about certain topics are solely based upon the experiences of our family and friends. And while many of us have similar thoughts about certain issues our views might greatly diverge on other topics...so to assume that just because a person agrees or thinks in a similar fashion about some things that they would agree with you on all other things would be a gross injustice to them and to you...
So when it comes to settling down with someone it's important to figure out those issues which are important to both of you and ensure that your value system is the same atleast on those... otherwise it just leads to un-necessary complications and marriage is tough without having that to deal with too..
Sunday, April 01, 2007
Truth
The truth is almost always more complicated than it seems... Everything is not black n white.. Some things have shades of grey...But the truth always surfaces sooner or later...
Friday, March 30, 2007
Love's Philosophy
The Fountains mingle with the River and the Rivers with the Ocean,
the winds of Heaven mix for ever with a sweet emotion;
Nothing in the world is single;
All things by a law divine in one spirit meet and mingle.
Why not I with thine?
see the mountains kiss high Heaven and the waves clasp one another;
No sister-flower would be forgiven if it disdained its brother,
and the sunlight clasps the earth and the moonbeams kiss the sea:
What is all this sweet work worth if thou kiss not me?
-Percy B Shelley
the winds of Heaven mix for ever with a sweet emotion;
Nothing in the world is single;
All things by a law divine in one spirit meet and mingle.
Why not I with thine?
see the mountains kiss high Heaven and the waves clasp one another;
No sister-flower would be forgiven if it disdained its brother,
and the sunlight clasps the earth and the moonbeams kiss the sea:
What is all this sweet work worth if thou kiss not me?
-Percy B Shelley
Dancing
Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who could not hear the music.
-Angela Monet
-Angela Monet
The Purpose of Life
We all die, the goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will.
Thursday, March 29, 2007
True Love
For some quite inexplicably, love fades; for others love grows stronger with time... and for still others love is simply lost... But then of course love can also be found...
I believe True Love doesn't stop when time passes, or you live in different places, or sombody's gone....true love transcends space and time...
I believe True Love doesn't stop when time passes, or you live in different places, or sombody's gone....true love transcends space and time...
Monday, March 26, 2007
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Death
As flies to wanton boys are, we to the Gods. They kill us for their sport.
-William Shakespeare
-William Shakespeare
Saturday, March 24, 2007
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Pure Love
Have you ever thought of a love so pure that you want to do what's best for the one you love ? How many of us ever achieve that heightened level of awareness ? Most parents feel strongly about their children... strongly enough to give up their lives without a second thought if it came to a choice...and most children would do the same for their parents.. but how many couples would do it ? Seriously, how many couples even understand each other enough, to know that sometimes it's better to go different ways than to hang on to each other and make each other miserable in the long run.. by standing in the way of each others dreams and aspirations...sometimes the simplest actions such as walking away are hardest to follow through with.....
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
In the Pursuit of Happiness
We spend our entire lives in the pursuit of the happiness... and what is happiness really.. it's a fleeting moment in life when everything is right...when the world seems a beautiful place and we feel at one with everything and everyone...as if we couldn't wish or hope for anything more... but I say it's a fleeting moment, because given time we want more...it's just human nature...
I think happiness is almost like an illusion or maybe even a state in which we are delusional and believe that life is perfect...and in time...reality bites.. nice and hard... and it's back to the search for the unattainable...
Everyone has hopes, everyone has dreams, everyone has pain, everyone has ambitions, everyone wants something, needs something , desires something, cherishes something, loves someone, dislikes someone, hurts someone, wants to protect someone and while all our lives are so different in the end it's all the same...
I think happiness is almost like an illusion or maybe even a state in which we are delusional and believe that life is perfect...and in time...reality bites.. nice and hard... and it's back to the search for the unattainable...
Everyone has hopes, everyone has dreams, everyone has pain, everyone has ambitions, everyone wants something, needs something , desires something, cherishes something, loves someone, dislikes someone, hurts someone, wants to protect someone and while all our lives are so different in the end it's all the same...
Friday, March 09, 2007
Would you lie with me and just forget the world ???!
We'll do it all
Everything On our own
We don't need Anything
Or anyone
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel
Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life
Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads
I need your grace
To remind meTo find my own
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life
All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes
They're all I can see
I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things
Will never change for us at all
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world ??!!
-Snow Patrol ( Chasing Cars)
Everything On our own
We don't need Anything
Or anyone
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel
Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life
Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads
I need your grace
To remind meTo find my own
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life
All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes
They're all I can see
I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things
Will never change for us at all
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world ??!!
-Snow Patrol ( Chasing Cars)
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Hope
Sometimes hope is all we've got.. and waiting is the hardest part.. not knowing.. just hoping that things will go as we want them to...bcoz we can't even imagine the alternative at the moment...it's just too upsetting and scary...
For a change I hope things will go in my favour...
For a change I hope things will go in my favour...
Monday, March 05, 2007
Reflections
This is a pic I took on a nice deserted beach in kerala while watching the sunset...I really like this pic... something so powerful and peaceful at the same time...
Should be able to take lots more pics as soon as our beach house is ready and I get the chance to go n stay there...
Hopefully by then I'll know more about photography than I know now... :-)
Friday, March 02, 2007
Food Orgy in Kerala
George Bernard Shaw once said ,"There is no sincerer love, than the love of food"...n how true that is...
I spent the last week in Kerala..n had the most amazing time.. my entire family believes in eating constantly, and most of my family can put a good chef to shame... so as expected i've gained quite a bit of weight.. so now the weight loss plan begins.. but here are a few pics of my grandmothers delicasies.. maybe that will explain why i couldn't resist.. :-)))
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Memories
Life gives us brief moments with another...but sometimes in those brief moments we get memories that can last a lifetime...
I've learned that goodbyes will always hurt, pictures will never replace having been there, memories good and bad will bring tears, and words will never replace feelings.....
I've learned that goodbyes will always hurt, pictures will never replace having been there, memories good and bad will bring tears, and words will never replace feelings.....
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