Sunday, September 03, 2006

The Quarrels of Lovers are like summer storms, Everthing is more beautiful when they have passed

Ever really thought about why relationships are so hard? Is it because being alone is harder? Anyway, let’s take a moment to explore the situation further. Boy meets Girl, Boy and Girl spend time together, Boy and Girl are happy, Boy and Girl start to exclusively date, and that is when all sense goes out of the window.

Oh the illogical things people fight about, it’s quite amazing. But after having a long and interesting discussion with a close friend I think we’ve narrowed it down to a few problems which every couple has,the rest are just permutations and combinations of the same thing.

So here go the standard problems and my take on them :-

1)Girl/Boy overly possessive or not the least bit bothered - Supposedly there is an exact degree to which you have to be possessive and no further. It’s like a warning light goes off which says “Sorry my friend, you have crossed the limit, please leave, better luck next time.” So you’ve got to master this or your relationship will end before it begins.

2) Why haven’t you called me? – For some reason it never occurs to the person asking the question why he/she couldn’t pick up the phone and call if she/he didn’t receive a call. Very strange, but happens a lot.

3)Why are you always late ? – If you ever go to a shopping mall, a movie theatre or any public place like a coffee shop there will be at least one couple having this fight. In Mumbai I once saw a girl spill an entire cup of cold coffee, ice cubes and all on a guy's head for being late. So always a fun fight, but can get messy, so unless you have a change of clothes, it’s just easier to be on time.

4)You always take me for granted ! – When u hear these six words, you know its going to be a long long night. Here you have to beg and plead and promise that such behaviour will not be repeated, after all you wouldn’t like it if anyone took you for granted so that’s the only solution here. And from my experience more women have this complaint than men, though there are enough men who complain too.

5)Where is this relationship going ? –This question always reminds me of a kid on a car ride, constantly asking "Where are we going ? Where are we going ?". Now let's be honest, most people don't even have a plan for tomorrow so such profound questions are never going to be answered with any degree of clarity. I've always believed it's a bid by your partner to make you play Nostradamus.But don't get carried away , i think all their really asking is if your in it for the long haul or not. So that's one you got to figure out at break neck speed once you hear this question being thrown at you.And even then , this could take a while, because no one is really sure what they want to hear.

6)Do you find him/her more attractive than me ? – Even if the person that is being referred to is a super model, NEVER EVER answer that question with a yes, unless you want your current relationship to end. If that is your aim, then not to worry, it will self destruct in five seconds, no guarantees that you will survive.

So Best of Luck and Remember, we all stumble, every one of us. That's why it's a comfort to go hand in hand. :-)

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